You still love each other
by loverxanime
Summary: Tori has left, leaving Jade with her own problems. Her problems, though, is that Tori is no longer there. Worst of it is that she was the one that made her leave. Why? Because of an stupid discussion. / Kind of AU/Future ff (Not really but...) /
1. She is gone

_**You still love each other**_

First of all, I'm sorry for any grammatical error you see here. English is not my first language, so yeah, any mistake here is my fault.

_**I don't own VicTORIous nor anything related to it.**_

* * *

_**Chapter one**_

_** She's gone.**_

It hurts. It hurts and it will hurt as long as you stay in that house, and you know it. You see her _everywhere_. There is no safe place in the house for you, and the knowledge of that pains you; it makes you feel so uneasy, so uncomfortable. _It makes you conscious of your past actions._

The sandy-colored walls reminds you of her. And why wouldn't they? She was the one to pick the color, declining your choice of color: a dark green that had always reminded you to a foggy day in the dark forest. She had said no, telling you that she did not needed to be in a scary forest. Scary. After all this time the word used makes you huff in amusement. You clearly remember making fun of her for that. But the amusement morphs to pain, leaving nothing but a faded memory of the feeling.

You try to recall why she is no longer here, and your teeth sinks on your bottom lip. Your eyes shut close at the pang of guilt and pain that assaults your chest. You feel weak. A quivering breath leaves your lips, and a sob escapes your throat. You realize now that you are crying, for her, because you miss her, and for you, for being so stupid and stubborn.

Why was so important that discussion, that fight? What had made you take things to the edge? Whatever the answer is, you hate doing what you did. You threw your relationship away, you let her walk out of your life… _you_ made her leave, little by little, you kicked her out of you life. Unconsciously, of course. In your right mind you would never let her leave.

But that was the problem: you were not. You had obsessed over the fight, trying to get the upper hand at any cost. But there was no upper hand. There was not winning nor losing to that fight. There was just, in the end, losing or getting even. There was the option of stopping all that, forget it, and continue with your happy life with her. You clearly didn't pick that one.

You picked an option where none of you won. You lost, but you lost her. You lost the person you love most, and all thanks to your flaws. Those same flaws that captivated her in the begging. Maybe your love was not that strong, or maybe one loved most than the other, who knows. But the losing end fell on you. No, no. It felt on both. The sheer pain in her eyes was overwhelming. Of course you didn't cared at that moment. Your anger and shock was so much to notice or think about anything else that wasn't the fact of the love of your life walking away, both from the house and your life.

And then it dawned on you.

You rose to your feet and sprinted to your room, tripping and almost falling. Removing the black-stained tears from your eyes you search on the heap of clothes you have in the corner, searching for something, your hands moving hastily to try and find something. You grip tightly a black coat, and you throw it to the bed. You slip a hand in a pocket that is placed on the top of the coat. Nothing. Growling in discontent, your hands pat every single place of the coat frantically, your breathing now fast and heavy. Your movements stop when you hear a sound. Desperately, you undo the button of the pocket and slide out the folded paper.

You smile ruefully. How could you forget it? With trembling hands, you unfold it. It's a letter from _her_. The tears brim your eyes once again. You cover your mouth with your hand, muffling the sounds of your cries. Your eyes pass over the handwriting, analyzing every letter, every word, every sentence. You berate yourself for taking so long to remember the letter.

Rushing to the front door, you turn the knob, before stopping and patting your hand over the pockets of your pants. Cussing under your breath you search the house for your car keys, leaving the letter over the small table where the phone is.

You smirk as you pick the keys and shove them to your pant's pocket. Stopping by the table where you left the letter, you stare at the phone. Maybe you should call first, see if she's still up to it. If she is still willing to accept you back in her life. Your lower lip quivers and your chest hurts as you imagine her telling you she doesn't wants you anymore, that she has moved on with her life.

You swallow spit as you try to not cry again, and you pick the phone, your pale finger pressing the numbers you know so well. You shift your weight from one foot to another as you wait nervously for a certain voice. The phone beeps a fifth time, and you decide to hang up.

"_What do _you_ want?"_

You smile a bit as you hear her sister's voice.

"Well… I was wondering… is she there?" Your voice is so small and you are shaking.

"_No, she isn't you jerk._"

You flinch at the sharpness in her voice, and, mustering al the courage you have, you speak again. "Are you sure, Trina? I–I know I hurt her, and I'm really, really sorry, but—"

"_I told you she isn't here!_" Biting your inner cheek, you start to fiddle with the letter.

"Then… when will she be?"

Trina growls in the other end of the phone. "_And how the heck am I supposed to know?! Maybe she will never be here! And it's all your fault!_" Your eyes start to water again as you hear Trina's sobs.

"What… what do you mean?" You ask with a trembling voice as you refuse to accept or even think again about that thought that crossed your mind.

"_What does it sounds like to you, Jade?! She is not here! And I blame you for taking her away from me!_" Trina hung up after that, leaving you mouth-open and in tears again.

The phone slips from your grasp as you let yourself fall to the floor, your legs pushed against your chest as your head rest between them, your hands balled into fist pressing at your temples.

"_No… she can't be… she isn't…_" A loud sob makes its way up your throat, as you feel dizzy and your stomach churns. "_She can't, she can't, _she can't, she can't! _She. Can't!_"

As you grit your teeth, the tears fall freely across your cheeks, leaving more black trails. Your nails dig in the palm of your hands, a burning sensation making its presence in those places where your skin is being harassed by your own nails.

Inhaling a deep and shaky breath, you press your lips together, trying to tone down the spasm that rocks your body as well as trying to muffle your sobs.

'_But you so can't be, Tori Vega.' _You think angrily, the anger more directed to yourself than the woman you still love so much. You exhale slowly. '_Dare to be death and I…'_

You look at the letter lying on the floor as the words written there flash in your mind.

_**Jade:**_

_I'm leaving. Probably you already know it by now, but I want to tell you to not take it in a bad way. I love you, and you know it. I'm sorry to leave you alone. I really am._

_It hurts to walk away from this house. From our house and home. I beg you to understand why I can't stay here. I just can't take this anymore. All this yelling that has been going between us is killing me inside. Is the bad kind of pain, you know? I just don't want to be hurt more than what I already am. I'm sorry if I look like a coward to you. But I'm not, I just prefer to leave things how they are rather than make it all worse._

_I don't know what I'll do once I cross the threshold. But I assure you that you won't find me that easily. This stupid argument between us is really hopeless. I thought this had already been talked about, about this obsession of yours to have the reason._

_I know, I know. I'm rambling right now. So, I just wanted to let you know I gave up. Not to us, no, don't think that. I still love you immensely, trust me. But this… Sorry Jade, tears won't let me write more. So, I'm leaving, for how long I don't know. Maybe forever if this is how we are going to be always…_

_I'm sorry again, Jade. I love you, don't forget._

_ - Tori._

You chest is hurting from the pain, and your eyes sting from all the tears that have escaped from them. You bare your teeth in anger at your own foolishness for ignoring the sad and disappointed looks Tori had before she left.

Your nostrils flare in anger as you took the letter and read it again. _'Dare to be death, Vega, and I'll follow you to hell itself if its necessary to have you back. Then I'll kick your ass before kissing you senseless.'_

* * *

Again, sorry for all the errors there might be. And of course the lack of variety of words. As you can see my knowledge of words is very limited. Sorry if anything sounds weird.

Next and —_probably_— last chapter might take some time, 'coz school sucks and also does the homework… Well, hope you enjoyed it.


	2. I think I found you

_**Chapter two.**_

_**I think I found you…**_

* * *

Next morning, you wake to see you felt asleep in the couch of the living room, with the letter clutched tightly yet carefully against your chest. Your left leg hung over the couch's backrest and your right one bended, your left arm hanging from the armrest over your head. Definitely not a position you consider comfortable.

You growl in displeasure as you feel a numbness take place in your lower back once you take a sitting position. Rubbing your cheeks, you notice the now dry paths the tears left yesterday. Your eyelids fall as you furrow your brows and groan.

Leaving the letter on the coffee table, you walk towards your room, taking your clothes off before looking at the mirror. You make a grim face as you see the image reflected in the mirror.

Black streaks are painted down your cheeks, your pale skin making the black color more noticeable. Down your tired eyes are dark rings that are proof of the poor sleep you have been having the last nights.

_All because of your foolish mistake._

You feel the air escape your lungs as another wave of fresh tears brim your eyes, the hurting on your chest returning. Huffing heavily, you turn the tap and put your hands down the pouring water of the faucet, forcing the strangling feeling away. As you lean forward, you bring the water to your face, splashing it over and rubbing against your cheeks and around your eyes, trying to clean the dark colors in your face.

Sighing, you enter your bathroom, and let the water of the shower run before entering it, the hot water that hits your back feeling like heaven to you.

As you let out a moan of delight, you try to recall why exactly the love of your life is not there, with you. Why she isn't taking a shower with you or why there's no smell of delicious food coming from the kitchen. You remember some pieces of the fight that took place, yet you can't remember what had originated it.

You grimace as you remember some bits of the horrible things you told her. All of them hurtful things. The soap slips away from your grasp as you remember yelling at her how much of a mistake it was to get into a relationship with her, and the tears prick again at your eyes as the pained look on Tori's face comes to your mind.

You hate how you had no control of your mouth at that moment. You were just acting out of sheer anger at the moment. Just like you used to. _Just like you promised her you would never do._ You clench your jaw in frustration at that. You had _promised_ it to her. You broke your promise. A promise you did because you were confident it would never happen, and because you wanted to give her some assurance that you loved her enough to think before speak or act. And God knows how you hate promises…

'_But I did love her enough. I mean, I love her enough…'_ You start to feel a headache at the mess your feelings are. You do love her, you still do. Then, why did you started such a fight with her? _'I don't know… I don't remember… just what the heck I did?'_

You force yourself to think about other things, like what will you have for breakfast today, or what did you had for breakfast yesterday. You chuckle as your stomach growls. Yeah, you had just a cookie for breakfast yesterday, and you don't remember eating anything else, which would explain why the hunger.

As you dry your black hair with the green towel, you begin to wonder where Tori might be in those moments. You smile softly as you imagine her on the couch, the T.V. on while she is reading a book, clearly not paying attention to whatever is on the screen.

Picking whatever clothes you find in your closet, you put them on. You yawn as you pick your cell phone and wallet and slide them in the pockets of your pants.

Time to go and see where you can find her. You decide to start on Beck's department. Maybe he will know about Tori's whereabouts. Maybe he will tell you something relevant. And when you get what you need of information, you'll search for her. And you will find her.

Yes, you will find her, and you will love her more than ever and you will show her how sorry you are from your previous actions. But until then, you have to keep a good façade, and act like everything is normal, and that you are not dying on the inside slowly…

Your gaze is fixed on the door in front of you, as your mind starts to deviate from the original plan. What if Trina was lying, and Tori is with her? What if she is just staying on a hotel instead of a friend's house, and is just waiting for the proper time to come back to you and wait for and apologize you will gladly and wholeheartedly give her?

Shaking your head, you bring your hand up and knock firmly with your knuckles, hoping Beck would be there and not working or doing God-knows-what. As you hear footsteps and a _'Coming'_ you start to panic a little bit, and you feel like having an anxiety attack. _'Man up, Jade. It's for the best…'_

"Hi, whoa— Hey. Hi there Jade. Come in." You nod curtly as you enter the small apartment. You take seat on his couch, not waiting for him to speak anymore.

"Where is Tori?" The words escape your mouth in a rushed way, and the desperation lacing your voice makes you want to punch yourself.

_You really hate feeling weak and desperate, after all._

The Canadian closes the door before taking seat next to you, "Yeah, hello. And… shouldn't you know where she is?" You bite your lip and lower your gaze as you think about what you'll say next.

Maybe it was a bad idea coming here. He doesn't seems to know and that's all you needed to know. He doesn't knows about her… he doesn't seems to know _what_ happened between you two. And you don't want to explain him anything. _You simply don't want to remember what you have already forgotten._

"Well… it's kind of… complicated, what happened between us, you know?" He raise his brows, something you have full knowledge of its meaning. "Okay! We might have had… a fight like the ones you and me used to have… I think it was worse… And I–I didn't—"

Your eyes fill with tears again and you hide your face behind your hands. Two arms grab you and pull you against its owner's chest, in which you cry freely while having an iron grasp onto his shirt.

One week. One week is the time you have been without her. One week of not hearing about her. In the beginning, you were fine with it; you understood that she would have wanted some time alone. And you let things slip for two days. By day three you were beginning to get worried. You'd call her ten times per day for the following days, if not more or less. You'd leave her text, asking if she was coming back or where she was. Or if she was alright… You never got an answer from it.

By day fourth you were already a wreck, with your eyes red and your hair a mess, while your mind only could wonder where was Tori. And you slept throughout all the following day, all the emotions finally getting to you and leaving you fully exhausted.

"_Hey… shh, it's okay Jade, it's okay…" _Beck mumbled in your hear, a futile attempt in getting you to calm down.

'_No it's not freaking okay! I might have probably made the worst decision on my life!' _You thinkto yourself as your tears keep falling down your eyes.

"I know she's okay, Jade… She came to me five days ago." You pull apart from Beck's comforting embrace and look at him with expectant eyes. "She was a bit angry… she just didn't told me why, and only asked me to please not tell you anything about her visit… or her whereabouts and—"

Beck's eyes widen for a second as you grab roughly his shirt's collar and bring his face to yours. "_Tell me. Where is she?" _You growl as your hope raises, making your heart take a leap at the mere thought of Tori being in your arms soon.

"Well, she told me not to tell so—"

"_Talk Oliver, or I'll _make_ you talk."_ He sighs and grabs your hands, forcing them gently to leave his collar.

"I won't tell you where she is exactly, 'cause she didn't told me… but… she's staying at one of our old friend's house." You smile at him and hug him tightly. "Just please don't make things like it was with us… that would crush you both."

"_Whatever Oliver…"_ You mumble as you imagine in your head Tori's bright smile.

* * *

You sip from your favorite coffee as you drive to a certain direction. You know where she's staying. The most obvious place in the world, really. You want to feel angry at yourself for not thinking about that before, yet you are feeling so happy that you wonder how could you take almost a week of what could be madness. But it doesn't matter, you found her. Or so you think. No, you have found her, you are sure. You just know it.

Once you have parked your car, you climb off of it before locking it, coffee in hand. Your steps are confident as you walk towards the front door of one of your _'old friends' _as you all call the friends made before finishing school.

Licking your lips in anticipation, you knock the door, and, after what it seems like an eternity, Andre opens the door.

"Umnh… Hi Jade?" You just look at him before pushing past him and enter his house without invitation. "Yeah, you can pass girl."

Stopping, you turn on your heels and face the boy, who almost bumps against you. "Tell me where she is." You demand, going straight for what you want.

"Where is who?"

"Don't play fool with me! Speak!" He steps back and raises his hands, and you force yourself to stay calm, reminding yourself this is exactly why you and Tori are not together in those moments. "I mean… where is Tori? Andre, I know you are letting her stay. And I know I made the biggest mistake on my life. But… please, I _beg_ you to tell me where she is."

He looks at you, staying silent for a moment, apparently very dumbfounded to know what to say. He sighs and shrugs, shoving his hand on the pockets of his pants. He lowers his gaze, not meeting yours. He's hiding something, you know it, but you don't want to tell him to speak.

"Look, Jade…" He starts as he meets your gaze again, "I know you are sorry. And Tori's sorry too for leaving you… but I don't think she will forget this easily; and maybe that's why she still hasn't come to you."

You frown as you hear him say those things. Did Tori told him too? Did she tell everyone about something private between the two of you? Your blood boils in anger, and you want to start yelling again, this time, at Andre, since he is the nearest person you have. You shake your head and dig your nails on the palm of your hands. You will have to keep your anger fits on bay, you'll have to learn to do so, in order to still be with Tori…_ 'If she ever comes back to me…'_

"Well I just… I just wanted to tell her that I'm really sorry. For hurting her so much and telling her thing that weren't necessary. And that I regret doing those stupid things as well as breaking a promise." You don't look at him, instead you look at the floor as you wish Tori could hear you.

"Sorry Jade. I wish I could tell you she's here. But she's not… Oh, but she did gave me this." You watch as he walks toward the table that is beside the door that —_if you remember correctly—_ leads to the kitchen and picks a folded paper.

Another letter from her, you assume.

"She told me to give you this in case you'd come here in search for her."

You nod slowly as you take the folded piece of paper. You leave after that, not bothering to say goodbye.

The ride to your house is silent as your mind only imagines what the letter could possibly say. A lot of scenarios play through your head. The bad ones outweighing the good ones. You start to feel anxious, with a burning desire to just stop and read the letter. Yet you refrain yourself from that.

Once in your home, you throw your wallet and keys to the coffee table, your hands taking the letter out of your pocket and unfolding it eagerly.

_**Dear Jade:**_

_Well, if you are reading this, I congratulate you for still keep searching me. Remember I still love you, don't you dare to forget that, please. Anyhow. I'm sure you have asked Andre about my whereabouts. Yeah, I'm sorry you didn't found me. I know you must be on the verge of madness about now. Sorry to keep you in that state, I know how you hate it. I really don't mean to._

_I don't know what to say. By now, I'm sure you are sorry for your behavior. And I'm sorry for just leaving you without warning. I'm more sorry that you just woke up just when I was planning to leave. And I'm even more sorry for just ignoring you when you started to yell._

_And now, I'm sorry for making you read this long letter. But, if you want to know a little bit more about this, just keep reading. If you don't want to know anymore, I'll understand. I really will…_

You tear your eyes apart as the words are starting to become a blurry mess of black spots. Your blue-green eyes stare at those last words. "_If you don't want to know anymore, I'll understand. I really will…"_ Cursing under your breath, you remember all those relationships in which Tori was, all of those helping on the random moments the girl would have and be depressed.

You shiver as you remember the first time it had happened. God how you wanted to beat those guys senseless and leave them in a blabbering mess. Breathing deep, you keep reading the letter.

_So. If you keep searching, you might find another letter. Or the letter will come to you. Whatever it happens, I don't know if you will ever find me. Remember those first years we meet? Ha, yeah, those years when you would always pick me as your favorite person to bully. I don't want to believe you will be back to your old ways. But… that little voice in my head. You remember it, don't you? It's making its appearance again…_

_And maybe it had reason all the way…_

_Maybe you never loved me…_

_And maybe you think you do, when you really don't._

_I really miss you and love you, Jade. You have no idea how much. But… I think a little bit of more time should come useful. Maybe, if I make it, we can go back to happy-normal?_

_Well, I'm sorry again for the long letter. I didn't mean it to be this long._

_We will see each other some day, that I'm sure of._

_Love you forever and always. Like we promised._

_Tori._

Taking a shaking breath, you stare at those letters. How can she even think you don't love her anymore? You promised a forever and always, and even vowed to not break that promise, to yourself, of course.

A small smiles forms on your lips. Tori's still alive. Struggling with things you'd wish you could help with… but alive nonetheless. You close your eyes, the smile widening.

'_Of course I'll keep searching for you, Tori. Don't ever doubt that.'_ You accommodate yourself in the couch in a way you know will not leave you so numb the next morning. Leaving the letter under the small pillow you have placed in the couch after the second night sleeping there, you close your eyes, ready to dream about you two being together again. Like_ happy-normal_ as she puts it.

* * *

A somewhat filler chapter but… well hope you enjoyed. Even though it took a different path than what I had thought. Dang, it really took a different way. And it ended up longer! Ugh. Again, any funny-looking word, phrase or whatever, my fault.

Anyway. Next part again, might take its time, since there's still lot of hw to do… add my laziness and the other activities I realize during the day. Wait for it :3.


	3. Am I getting nearer?

_**Chapter three**_

_**Am I getting nearer?**_

Next day, you decide to make another visit to one of your 'old friends'. Cat's house is your destination as you drive around the city on your car. You smile again as you take another sip of your coffee. Yesterday you sure slept well. The reassurance of Tori's words telling you she still loves you helped. And even though you are worried to death about what could happen to her in these times you aren't with her and are not able to help her with whatever problem she might encounter, you know she is strong enough to deal with them for the moment being.

_Until you both see each other again._

Cat receives you cheerfully, something you are quite glad about, since you think some cheerfulness from her will do you good. You need to spend time in something to keep you mind away from the depressing thoughts you have about Tori. You need to focus on something happy, cheerful, something that gives you hope.

As you take seat in your friend's red sofa, your eyes wander around the small yet comfortable living room. In front of the sofa, there's a coffee table with a pink notebook on it. An island being the only thing separating the kitchen from the living room, wood chairs all put against the wall near it.

You raise a pierced eyebrow at this.

"Family again?" You ask as Cat brings two cups of coffee; she just nods to your question.

"Yeah, I think Robbie's family is still so weird." She gives you a puzzled look as you laugh a bit at that comment. "What's so funny, Jade? Robbie's family is just _so_ weird!" You keep laughing as she pouts.

"I know it, girl. But you have to admit they are not alone on that."

She frowns a bit, not understanding you. "What do you— Ohhh!" Her mouth drops open when you give her a look. "You keep being so mean to me." You smile at her and pet her head.

She keeps being so innocent at some times.

"Well girl, tell me what's been happening in your weird life with Robbie."

Cat's lips turn into a bright smile, and she begins to tell you what has been happening lately on her life. About how Robbie keeps being so sweet to her, and how he takes her to romantic places to take dinner. She tells you that even though he has to go and visit his family from time to time, he calls her whenever he can.

And you start to think back to those years when you would bully the boy. Because, _well_, he was Robbie. But now, that he and Cat have been dating for three years, you think that the boy was definitely a good choice for Cat.

He would keep a pace the girl wanted, and he wouldn't pressure her to rush anything she didn't wanted. He was in fact, the kind of boy Cat needed. Over that was the fact that Robbie loved her. And that was the thing you knew any boy who wanted to date your best friend needed.

Robbie had always defended Cat, from anyone, even if he was a shaking mess out of fear, he would stood up to any person who dared to hurt the once red-headed girl. God, he had even stood up against you in order to protect her from any harsh words you would have at the moment. That alone was something you have always liked about him.

Time pass as you both talk about whatever comes to mind. From how's weather to what has been happening lately. Of course, you don't mention your last week. No need for Cat to know you have been a total jerk to your girlfriend that you made her leave. No, you have no necessity in hearing whatever speech she might have about your behavior.

After some snacks you decide to leave, seeing as is getting late and dark's slowly replacing the orange streaks that paint the sky.

"Well, see you later." You say to your friend as you kiss her cheek. "And when Robbie gets back or call tell him I said 'Hi'. And that his family needs to get their problems solved without him. Leaving you alone is getting my approbation of him to zero."

Cat laughs at your joke, and nods, before giving her usual 'See you, Jadey.' And even thought you still dislike the 'Jadey', you tell her nothing.

You drive to your house, not stopping for anything. You don't feel hungry, and you know that some more coffee right now would keep you up, and you don't want that, seeing as you want to sleep earlier.

The first thing you notice as you close the door is how clean the place is. You frown slightly, feeling tense. Someone entered your house, and you feel angry at that. But anger fades and panic rises in your chest as you notice some missing things. One of them being a photo that you had in the fridge.

You stride toward it and open the door; stupidly hoping you could find it inside. Your chest tightens. _It's not there._

"What in the…?" Confusion overpowers everything else, as you see food in the fridge. Food you didn't remember it was there.

As you close the door you finally see the piece of paper that is now on the place the old photo was hanging before. You take it carefully as you smile and go to the couch. As soon as you take seat, you start to read.

_**Hey there Jade:**_

_Seems the letter came to you. Or well, I left it for you. Yeah, I came here around three. You weren't here, and —sorry for saying it— I'm glad for that. I'm still not ready to come back._

_But dude, you have a mess in here. I'm gone for a bit more than a week and you have thrown almost every ounce of cloth haphazardly all around the house. And lets not talk about our fridge. What where you thinking? Food is important! Not only coffee, you know?_

_As you can see, I cleaned this place, and also got you some food, so you don't starve. Get your lazy ass moving and make yourself something to eat, I won't be buying food for you all the time :{/._

You laugh to yourself at Tori's words. But can she blame you? You were so heart-broken that you couldn't care for the place. You just left everything in any place you could. And going for food seemed like a big task for you to realize, so you just ate some cookies, hence your weight loss.

You shake your head at Tori's way of putting the mustache in the face she did. After all those years, she keeps liking mustaches. You never understood why, and you still don't.

_Well, I'm feeling better, and I still love you. So maybe I'll come back in a bit more of time. Ain't that some good news? Buuut, we'll have to talk a bit about… you know, your anger fits._

_It really hurts me when you just talk without thinking. I know you don't mean it, but it still hurts, Jade. And before anything: no, I don't forgive you. I don't forgive your behavior, and definitely I don't forgive you for saying those things you did._

_And don't start crying, girl! 'Cause, you know, there's nothing to forgive. You did nothing wrong, after all. And I know you think you did, and in fact, you _did._ But I don't care, after thinking, I believe that if you tell me what caused you to be that snappy and if we talk about it, I'll understand you had your reasons. Thus I think there's nothing to forgive._

_So, until next time Jade._

_Lots of kisses and hugs:_

_Tori._

You sigh and smile as you close your ayes and lean your head on the backrest. You feel a huge desire to hug and kiss her, to tell her you have done wrong and you recognize it. You tell yourself that, when Tori sets date to your talk, you will tell her you will think before opening your mouth the next time. And that you'll also talk to her when something is going wrong.

You tell yourself that, next time, you will talk to her instead of pushing her and ignoring her when she wants to help you. You love her, and as her girlfriend, you should talk with her in order to work things out. And you will do, but you just have to wait.

Feeling hungry, you rose to your feet and walk to the kitchen, deciding that a good meal will do you good. As you eat dinner, you think about what feeling the letter gave you. By the look of it, it seemed as if Tori was getting better. And she will be back in your arms in no time, by the looks of it. Your heart leaps in glee at the thought, and a stupid smile is placed on your lips.

You definitely did wrong. You know it. And even though Tori will insist you didn't, you'll always know you did. You sigh and stare down at you food. You wonder once again why does the girls is so… forgiving. You still don't get how she can simply brush off whatever you throw at her when your anger speaks for you.

And yet, even though you can't comprehend how she can just let things slip that easily, you are grateful that she sees things as insignificant even though she shouldn't. That she can see all your harsh words as nothing more but a little and insignificant thing. That she thinks there's no need to worry about the little mistakes you both do.

You love that of her. And even though you know you don't deserve that of her, nor do you think that is something she should do, you still love it to no end.

You smile to yourself and close your eyes, taking a big, relaxing breath.

* * *

I'm so sorry for the delay! And I'm also sorry that this chapter is lame... and short. Again, I apologize for any grammatical error there might be. All my fault, sorry.

The delay is because I began to play again with my videogames _(and God knows how much time I can spend in those!)_. Then, the exams, I've been having those for like three/four weeks in a row, then a lot of homework when there where days without exams. Aaand, I still have one more week off exams, and some hw I still need to finish so... yeah. Next one might take a bit more (not like this one, but it'll take its time).


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